I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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