Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
