I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
