This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
