It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
