i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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