I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
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