Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
Life is so much better after having sex.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
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