The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
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