People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Randomize
