he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize
