I love black thongs
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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