You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize
