What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
