onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
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