My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize