i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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