Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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