I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
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