Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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