Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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