Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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