I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
