Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
