Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
we're so committed to being not committed
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Randomize
