Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
