i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
