ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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