we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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