I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Randomize