So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
