hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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