I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Randomize
