do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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