He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
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