doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Randomize
