Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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