I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
