ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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