I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I'm sobbing to NWA
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
