So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
