i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
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