I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
