Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
