hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
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