Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Randomize
