The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
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