So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Randomize
