I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
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