Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I just made out with a guy for $7.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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